Bonecrusher's Blog of Hate

Name's Bonecrusher. If you're reading this, I hate you. If you're not reading this, I hate you. Actually, I just hate you period. In fact, I hate everything. This blog examines the subtleties and complexities about this mindset, which flashbags like yourselves can only hope to ever achieve. Good luck with that.

Thursday, December 13, 2007

The Final Straw

You had to do it, Hasbro, didn't you. It wasn't enough for the ugly repaint and the pathetic tiny thing. You not only had to throw me in a two-pack with Ironhide, but you had to drive my depression through the roof with... with... Oh sweet Primus, I can't say. You had to make me.... THIS!I can't go on anymore. That... sicking thing... My very spark... It is shattered....

No...

NO.

I WILL CONTINUE ON! Though the pain of my existence is insufferable, I swore to you fleshbags that I would show you why to Hate the entire Universe, and with Primus as my witness, that I shall do! I will not rest until all of you fleshbags suffer with me! My name is Bonecrusher and

I

HATE

EVERYTHING!

And Hasbro, you are NUMBER ONE on the list! Watch your back guys, Bonecrusher is COMING FOR YOU!

3 comments:

Mike said...

BC, it's really not that bad, is it? I mean, can't you look at these toys as an homage to you, rather than an insult? Think of Hasbro as honoring you rather than insulting you because really, who WOULD insult you?

But it might help to keep the robo-bile down a bit if you look at these as tributes to your almighty awesomeness, rather than a slap in the face. Seriously, these figures are the best our little monkey brains can come up with, really.

Jazz said...

Well, after reading that... maybe his monkey brain is on to something. It seems as though Hasbro has captured your "essence". Can you wrap your head around that? Probably not.

Wheelie said...

Wheelie say
you better off than me today
I only have a single toy
so be glad for what you have...boy...
ugh...
I'm so sick of rhyming!
Look here you long armed walnut head!
You were in the movie for five minutes FIVE and you get four toys and ALL the fans love you!
I was in an entire season and I get nothin' just a huntch backed orange turd for a toy and the hatred of the entire fandom!
I should be the one going around hating everything!ME!