Bonecrusher's Blog of Hate

Name's Bonecrusher. If you're reading this, I hate you. If you're not reading this, I hate you. Actually, I just hate you period. In fact, I hate everything. This blog examines the subtleties and complexities about this mindset, which flashbags like yourselves can only hope to ever achieve. Good luck with that.

Wednesday, February 13, 2008

Love, Naturally

Today I shall touch upon a subject that goes against everything I stand for - Love.

I love Nothing. I hate Everything. It's very simple. I am diametrically opposed to the concept of Love in general. So, of course, it greatly offends my sensibilities that you humans have a day dedicated to it. In fact, most Cybertronians in general are, at the very least, uncomfortable at what you humans call love.

Let's face facts. Love between two human beings is biologically disgusting. I'm fairly sure I don't need to get into the details of why, suffice to say that there's no telling what other disgusting microscopic 'things' are in the other person. It sounds like an awfully dangerous exercise to me.

You see, back on Cybertron, the concept of 'love' is a very foreign thing. We didn't have females (why would we? All life comes from the Allspark), though we did have Cybertronians with what you humans would describe as feminine traits. We had friendship, which in my opinion, is also a stupid concept, since you never know when your buddy is going to ditch you leaving you to face thirty angry Autobots alone. Scrapper, if you're reading this, I still haven't forgiven you, and never will.

Anyway, it wasn't until we found a couple biological species that we realized there was a concept called 'gender' at all. It was a very strange realization, and a couple freaks decided to start identifying themselves as one or the other. And it wasn't till we started hanging around Earth that we discovered the idea of love. Other biologicals have the good sense not to be so overt about it, but you humans... revel in it. Ugh. I get shudders thinking about it.

So, this 'Valentines day', you humans are supposed to show off your love for each other. But I must implore you, think about it first. Do you really love said person? Do you really want to be around that person-all-the-time? Think carefully. I'm not sure you humans know yourselves what your invention of 'love' is really all about.

And, for Primus's sake, could you please stop plastering lingerie commercials all over the place? I don't WANT to see more of your bodies. Disgusting.


Anonymous said...

So, all those women who swoon at Starscream (like me) ... let me guess ... you hate? lol

Weasel said...

Well, Valentine's Day is only good for the chocolate. Screw the rest.

Seriously, humans are like all other carbon based life forms, shooting DNA at each other to make babies. I find that offensive!