Awesome Transformation

Here is but one of the many reasons I am awesome: I can turn into anything, yes that's right, anything, tape decks, cassettes, boom boxes, TV's, VCR's, a Laptop, a Mountain Dew dispensor, and anything else that is awesome enough for me to turn into, in fact you can't believe how incredibly awesome my transformation is, I'm like woosh-woosh-woosh and then BAM, I'm a brick, and you can throw me at people's heads because that's just how awesome I am. Not like that big fat lumbering dolt Bonecrusher, who is not awesome, in fact he's crabby and grouchy and mean and I can't understand why, I mean, it's not like he wants for anything or that he's particularly disliked, my theory is that he just has some really bad rust that won't go away like I had that one time back on Cybertron, there was cosmic rust going around and everybody got it and it was just horrible and most decidedly not awesome, fortunately we got over it and now we're all better and things can be awesome again! Don't you wish things were awesome?