Bonecrusher's Blog of Hate

Name's Bonecrusher. If you're reading this, I hate you. If you're not reading this, I hate you. Actually, I just hate you period. In fact, I hate everything. This blog examines the subtleties and complexities about this mindset, which flashbags like yourselves can only hope to ever achieve. Good luck with that.

Monday, March 17, 2008

The Canidate For Hating You

Let's see what the email box has today...

Dear Bonecrusher,

I see you have found other ways to pass the time. How does Megatron and Starscream feel about your decision in attempting to run for president? You know if your elected (which you never will be) you will only be controlling one country, hardly a Decepticon move. Wouldn't you rather have control of the whole world? Oh well, whatever makes you happy. I guess you have to get what you think you can get.....which isn't much. By the way, I do believe I saw a pastel pink Bonecrusher toy the other day...just in time for Easter. How sweet.


Neither of them care. Their more concerned with destroying all humans rather than leading them. Me? I can do both.

As for controlling merely one country, it's a stepping stone.

And I don't believe you on that Easter thing. You're lying. And if your not, then I'm shifting one of my Campaign promises to 'Nuke Hasbro.' Which was kinda the plan anyway...

Hey Bonecrusher,

I was just looking over your blog's previous posts (again), and came across the recorded chat you had with Starscream regarding his "fangirl" problem (the way you owned him was priceless, and I commend you for that). After looking at this conversation, I thought to myself: "I wonder if Bonecrusher had any other chats like this one with his fellow Decepticons, and if he happened to record those too?"

I typically don't, so I only had that one on file. But if anybody happens to chat with me in the future, I'll be sure to record them for posterity.

From Frank Agogo
Abidjan,Cote d'Ivoire
West Africa,

Greetings in the name of God.

My name is Frank Agogo from Sierra Leone. My father and I escaped from our country at the heat of the civil war ,As a result of the political instability in my country even after the war,My father established his cocoa and coffee export business in Abidjan,Ivory Coast.He was in Buake, a northern city to negotiate for the purchase of a cocoaplantation when he was shot and killed by the rebel troupes fighting to takeover the government of the country on the 22nd September, 2002. The death of my father has now made me an orphan and there by exposing me to danger.

Before the unfortunate death, My late father had in his personal account with a bank here the sum of $2.5m. As a result of the present in security of lives and property in this country,
I wish request that you assist me use your account in your country to transfer the balance of my father's account. Again to assist me with a letter of invitation that will make me get a visa to your country for residence inorder for me to continue our education and to invest the fund in a viable business venture.

I and the rest of my family have decieded to give you 10% of the total sum for your kind assistance,while 5% has been marked for any expenses like phone calls,the world is full of bad people please i am not saying you are bad person but consider that this is money and how the money was gotten,it is inheritace and last hope,If this is acceptable to you,Then reply me as soon as you get this message,so that we can discuss further on this matter.

Thanks and GOD bless us.
Frank Agogo.

Hey, with that kind of money, I can get enough to run an excellent Campaign. Hillary would have NOTHING on me! Wait... why is he contacting a former Decepticon warrior for this process rather then someone who cares? Something smells just a tad fishy...

Nah. What's the worst that could happen?


Anonymous said...

Jazz has a point, Bonecrusher. You would definately be able to shape the world better if you controlled the whole world rather than just one country.


Anonymous said...

Hey, I say help that Frank Agogo guy out. That kind of money could help your campaign. Come on go for it. There's nothing fishy about that one. It's all in your head.


Anonymous said...

Why the heck do you need Frank's cash? If candidates just posted stuff on free boards and on youtube, they wouldn't need lots of advertising money. Besides, you strike me as the kind of person I am ... if you were selected for Survivor, wouldn't you just kill off the other contestants and declare yourself the "winner"? I would... LOL.